DOUBTING THOMAS by Bob Kessel after Caravaggio
Do not doubt but believe.
The risen Christ
and the doubting Thomas.
This is the whole
climax of John’s Gospel. In this interaction, the whole essence of faith, and
what belief actually is and how it works in illustrated in one scene.
Jesus has visited the
disciples and given them the gift of the Holy Spirit. This is in many ways the
Pentecost of Johns Gospel. This must have been a huge joy filled occasion.
But, Thomas, was
not there.
We don’t know what
he was doing, but we can hazard a guess that he was on his own, mourning the
death of Jesus.
Thomas, of all the
disciples shows the most human qualities. He is impulsive, he is forthright. He
doubts.
He is called the
twin, or didymus. Didymus can mean twin, or double tongued. It can mean being
in two minds. It is the idea of there being another side to what there is. The
two sides we are dealing with here are faith and doubt.
So, the disciples
come and tell Thomas in all their joy, “We have seen the lord!”
Thomas is
sceptical. “What do they mean, seen? What have they actually seen? How can it
possibly be Jesus? We all saw him die on the cross.”
Thomas has so many
reasons why it could in no way be Jesus that they have seen. They must be
deluded, or have been conned by some charlatan.
He states his
criteria to them.
"Unless
I see the mark of the nails in his hands, and put my finger in the mark of the
nails and my hand in his side, I will not believe."
Physical proof.
Unless he can see or feel, he will not believe.
Seems fair enough. That’ll show them.
A week later,
Thomas gets his chance.
What he had
suggested, probably in an attempt for them to see reality, happens.
Jesus appears, and
says:
"Put
your finger here and see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it in my
side. Do not doubt but believe."
Jesus is saying “Whatever
you need Thomas, whatever it will take, whatever it is you have asked to
believe that I am Christ who has conquered death, who has risen and is now here
in front of you. If you need to touch, here I am. Thomas, I will do anything it
takes for you to believe.”
Thomas is obviously
overwhelmed. He doesn’t need to touch Jesus. He only needs to see him, and he
says:
"My
Lord and my God!"
Jesus has managed
to bring Thomas from doubt to faith.
From a fading belief
to a full profession of the Christian: belief in the divinity of Jesus.
The thing here is
that Jesus wants Thomas to believe. He wants him to be with him where he is.
This is same for
us, for everyone. Jesus wants us to be with him. He knows that we are all
different. He knows that we all here today in different stages of our journey. He meets everyone where they are. He meets
those who don’t know him, and patiently waits.
But Jesus doesn’t
let him off the hook so easily:
"Have
you believed because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and
yet have come to believe."
And it is here that
we come in. This is really said to us. It was said for the first believers who
were not present at the appearances of Jesus after his resurrection. It was
said for all those who have followed since.
But we have all
been like Thomas at some point.
Moments where we
have doubted parts of the faith, or even doubted the whole thing.
Dark times where it
seems there is no point, and God has forsaken us.
Doubt is a part of
life.
Doubt is a part of
faith.
It is impossible to
have faith without doubt. They are two sides of the same thing.
Without doubt there
cannot be faith.
To have doubts
means we have accepted that faith is not static but is a journey.
Thomas was
despairing because the one who he was following had been put to death.
In that darkness he
was doubting all he had been through.
But from that
doubt, he found faith.
From within his
doubt, Jesus pulled out faith.
Within our doubt,
we find faith.
Jesus says to
Thomas, “Do not doubt, but believe.”
He wants Thomas to
believe, he wants us to believe.
Jesus is prepared
to meet us where we are, and that can, and often is, in a place of doubt.
Unlike Thomas we
don’t Jesus physically coming to find us. But what we do have is the knowledge
that those who have not seen and yet have come to believe are blessed.
To stay in a state
of doubt is not what we want to do, and it is not what Jesus wants us to do. As
he says to Thomas: Do not doubt, but believe.
However, there is
the idea that from within doubt there is belief, within the despair there is
hope. From within doubt, faith will arise.