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Sunday, May 25, 2014

Sermon for the Sixth Sunday of Easter



I am in my Father, and you in me, and I in you. 

Last week we spoke about longing, inconsolable longing.

This longing is a longing for God.
It is given to us by God, it is a gift.
It is given to us by God out of his longing for us.
It is his way of letting us know he longs for us.

Everyone experiences this.
Whether they believe or not, it is experienced.

We have a choice.
We can either wake up and realise this is what this sense is, or we can ignore it.
It is not going to go away.

Philip said ‘Show us the Father and we will be satisfied.’
It is only God that can satisfy us, it is only God that can console that longing.

It is when we recognise that the longing within us is from God and is indeed the same longing God has for us, that we can begin the journey.

The moment of recognition is when we respond to God.

Then it is time to wake up.

Jesus said: ‘If you love me, you will keep my commandments.

That is the first step in waking up, recognising God, and responding to God.
Knowing that longing is Gods love, and responding by following his way.
Following his commandments.
These aren’t a proscriptive list: they are more general.

Love God.
Love your neighbour.
Love your self
Love one another as I have loved you.
These are the first responses to waking up, the first responses to God’s love for us.

Is it that we do them to obey God, to be obedient,
or is it rather that we are only able to do them because we love God?

We wake up.

Thomas Merton said “We become contemplatives when God discovers himself in us”

It pays to think about waking up.
The actual thing that happens everyday.
How was it this morning?
Was it an alarm clock, one that violently pulled you out of sleep?
Was it a gentle process, with no hurry?
Was it you woke up before your alarm?
Did you wake up because you had somewhere to be?

Think.

You were asleep.
Then you were awake.

It is the same for the spiritual awakening.

Think that moment, where it seems to be between the two states.
Sometimes there can be confusion.
You become alert, you become aware of where you are, what is going on, and what you need to do.

When we are asleep, our brain waves are slower, perception is dulled.
We are not completely out of it, we are still conscious.
We dream, we can hear.

Waking up is moving from a lower to a higher level of awareness or consciousness.

If waking up is something we all do, so too is waking our spiritual selves.
We don’t learn how to wake up from sleep.
We just do it.
So it is with spiritual awakening.

Spiritual awakening came seem like a sudden experience, and sometimes it is.
It can be a shock.

It can happen after years of searching.
It can happen after years of not even thinking about it.

Waking up can be sudden like with an alarm, or it can be a gentle experience.
But the thing it is a response.

Spiritual awakening is a response to that longing.

It is the moment you recognise that longing as being a gift from God.
It is Gods longing for you within you.

The moment you recognise that is the moment you begin your journey of spiritual awakening.

Jesus tells his disciples that
the world will no longer see him, but they will see him; 

He says that to us, and he says:
because I live, you also will live. 

We live because Jesus Lives.

Then he says:
I am in my Father, and you in me, and I in you. 

This is expressed in a different way in the first letter of John:
God is love, and those who abide in love abide in God, and God abides in them.
If you think about where we started:
‘If you love me, you will keep my commandments.

A first response in waking up is love.
It is knowing that God loves you.
It is knowing that you love God.
It is knowing that in that feeling of love, God is present.

When Jesus says: I am in my Father, and you in me, and I in you.
He is speaking of his own divinity,
and he is speaking of his love for us and our response to that.
The inconsolable longing is recognised as a yearning to abide in God,
not just see as Philip asked,
but to abide.




Sunday, May 18, 2014

Sermon for the Fifth Sunday of Easter



Jesus said to him, ‘I am the way, and the truth, and the life.

This is one of the more famous passages from John’s gospel. You only have to have been to a funeral to have heard it. It is often chosen because it gives great comfort.

“In my Father’s house there are many dwelling-places. If it were not so, would I have told you that I go to prepare a place for you?”
Look at the question that gets Jesus to say this.
It is from Thomas,
he who will doubt,
he who will suggest that they all go and die with Jesus.

‘Lord, we do not know where you are going. How can we know the way?’

How can we know the way?
What is the way?
Is this the way?
Being here, praying, receiving communion,?
Is this the way?

Jesus said to him, ‘I am the way, 

Like last week where Jesus referred to himself as a gate,
here he is also a means of getting somewhere.
He is the way.
He was the gate, a means of getting in or going out, now he is the way.

He is the journey.

Jesus said to him ‘I am the way, and the truth’

Not a truth, but the truth.
The perfect correlation of thought and reality, of flesh and deity.
The truth,
not a system of propositions,
not a series of experiments that end up with a definite conclusion,
not a good story,
not a good idea
but the truth.
If you want to get more full on about it, there is nothing truer than Jesus Christ.
It is the truth we hold.
It is a universal truth and a personal truth.

Jesus said to him ‘I am the way, and the truth, and the life’

The life that enlivens all life. The wellspring of all that lives.
Our lives are lived in him, and he lives in us.
He is life as we are to live it and he is the life in us so that we can live.

As the 1st Letter of John says:
And we know that the Son of God has come and has given us understanding so that we may know him who is true; and we are in him who is true, in his Son Jesus Christ. He is the true God and eternal life.

Jesus is the true God and eternal life.

Jesus continues:
No one comes to the Father except through me.
If you know me, you will know my Father also.
From now on you do know him and have seen him.
Philip said to him, ‘Lord, show us the Father, and we will be satisfied.’

Well, Philip, you are looking at him. Whoever has seen Jesus has seen the father.
Are you satisfied.

I believe Philip’s question is the key to the way, the truth , the life.
If we can see the father, we will be satisfied.

This last part, we will be satisfied when we see the father is very true.
There is nothing else that can actually satisfy us.
WE all know that longing.

The Germans have a word for this: sehnsucht.
It can’t really be translated, but the best would “inconsolable longing.”
We all know this, we all experience it, we all avoid it, and we all try to smother it.

You know what I am talking about.
It is very hard to describe, but it is real.
It kind of hurts, there is often a physical sensation.
It can make your heart skip.
It can make you breathe differently.
It can come at odd times.

Music can make it happen.
A chord change or a twist in a melody can send a shiver through your body.
A song can take you back to a place and time, and there is the longing.

A longing that things could have stayed the same, or they could have changed.
A longing that you wish you were still there.

Seeing old photographs of places you have been is the same.
But what about the longing we have for places and people we have never met?
Where do you think the dream of time travel comes from?
It is an attempt to fulfil a longing that cannot be satisfied.
We play with the idea,
knowing it cannot be reality,
knowing it cannot happen, yet we continue you dream it.
We have that sense of inconsolable longing.

It’s like we like the feeling.

It’s like we are supposed to have it.

CS Lewis puts it like this: “This sweet desire cuts across our ordinary distinctions between wanting and having. To have it is, by definition, to want: to want it, we find, is to have it.”

Here is the point:

This longing is a longing for God.
It is given to us by God, it is a gift.
It is given to us by God out of his longing for us.
It is his way of letting us know he longs for us.

Everyone experiences this.
Whether they believe or not, it is experienced.

We have a choice.
We can either wake up and realise this is what this sense is, or we can ignore it.
It is not going to go away.
WE can try and interpret it as something as else, as need to create.
It can be misinterpreted as a sensual desire.

We can try to dull it by drinking, by drugs, by television, by sex, by gambling, or by buying things, all hoping that this longing will be satisfied.

But it never is.
It never can be.
It isn’t supposed to be.
That is where Philip’s thoughts are so interesting: He is right on the money:
Show us the Father and we will be satisfied.

It is when we recognise that the longing within us is from God and is indeed the same longing God has for us, that we can begin the journey.

The moment of recognition is when we respond to God.
Then it is time to wake up.








Sunday, May 11, 2014

Sermon for the Fourth Sunday of Easter



I am the gate. 
Whoever enters by me will be saved, and will come in and go out and find pasture. 

Jesus has two goes and explaining himself here.

In the first, he uses an image that all would have been able to understand,
or so he hoped.

The sheepfold he refers to was a courtyard in front of a house where the sheep were bought in for the night. It was not for just one flock, but several.
Each shepherd would bring their flock in for the night,
and it would be looked after by the gatekeeper.
There was no need to worry about who was getting whose sheep,
because the  shepherd would only have to speak,
and his sheep would recognise his voice.
The other sheep would not follow, nor would they follow another shepherd.

The gatekeeper would only open the gate for the shepherds that had left their sheep in the sheepfold.

The only other way in was by climbing over the fence.
The only person who would do this is the one who has no business there.
Their only purpose would be to steal.

The people don’t understand Jesus when he uses this parable.
He is being to obtuse.
They aren’t relating the shepherd, the sheep, the thieves, the gate to their life situation.

He goes in for another attempt.

I am the Gate.

What does a gate do?
A gate keeps people in and it keeps people out.
We can see a gate as protection.
Or we can see it as a means of access.
It depends where you are.
It depends what side of the gate you are on.

He isn’t saying he is the sheep, or the shepherd (yet) or even the gatekeeper.
He is the gate.
He is the means of going in and out of the sheepfold.
He isn’t the one who opens the door, he is the door.

He is the door by which the sheep and the shepherd go in and out.

So, the sheep are believers.
The sheepfold is the church.

The only way onto the church is through the door, Christ.
No other way in to the church.
You can’t come to church for prestige, status, respectability,
because someone makes you,
a need to protect it,
a desire to control it,
or to check on who is or isn’t there,
or what the priest is doing to your church.
The only way in to the church is through belief and trust in Jesus Christ.
That is the way in.
He is the door.

Whoever enters by me will be saved, and will come in and go out and find pasture.

Jesus is primarily talking about himself as the entry not as a means of keeping people out.
He is the way into the church.
It makes sense then that he is also the way out of the church.
Out to find pasture.
Jesus doesn’t mean that we just enter and stay.
He means we are go into the world and be. We go out through him.
We are to go and be with people where they are.

How do we enter into other peoples lives? Through him.
The only way we an be with other people is through him.
We can’t be carrying on about some other stuff, other things we are doing, what services we offer,
but only Jesus Christ.
All we do, all our outreach can only work if it is done through Christ.
He is the way in and the way out.

So, if the sheepfold is the church,
and Jesus is the gate, and we are the sheep,
who are the thieves and bandits?

They are the things that take our hearts, minds, and time away from Christ.
They climb over the walls of the church and take over from Jesus.
If it is not the Gospel, it will only destroy the church.
We need to be careful of what it is when we say we are doing the work of the church.
Is it through Christ, or is it through our own ego?
Is it to do Christ’s work, or is it to keep myself busy.

It all has to be through Christ.

He is the gate.
It is through him that we can find pasture outside.
It is through him that we can be the church.

It is only through him that we can have life.

I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly.



Sunday, May 4, 2014

Sermon for the Third Sunday of Easter


Jesus himself came near and went with them, 
but their eyes were kept from recognizing him. 

How often is that we don’t recognise the presence of Christ in our lives?
Is that our eyes are kept from recognising him,
like it is something out of our control?
Or is that we allow other things to keep our eyes from seeing him?

What are the things that get in the way of seeing Christ?

It can be over familiarity with the story.
It can be over familiarity with the liturgy.
It can be over familiarity with the church.
It can be over familiarity with yourself and your way of being a follower of Jesus.

More often than not,
it is mistaking something else for Christ and placing importance on that rather than the gospel.

A door, a tree, a hymn, who does what, who hasn’t done what.
All those things are not the gospel.

It is hanging on to something from the past that stops us from seeing Jesus in the present.
What has happened is gone.
Holding on to the past is like being on the road to Emmaus and standing still while Jesus walks on past,
never recognising who it was.

But we can work within the present.
Our eyes can be opened to see Christ in our presence.
In the breaking of the bread Jesus is present to us.
We need to be in the present to recognise him.
But sometimes the past won’t allow us to be present.

The past can be healed with forgiveness.
Knowing the forgiveness of God, and the ability to forgive others.
Holding on to past hurts blocks forgiveness,
and creates a distorted image of God,
where his forgiveness becomes twisted and conditional on our ideas of right and wrong.

Repentance. Forgiveness. Healing.

All allow us to have our eyes opened to the presence of Christ.

When I first started going to church, the third mass I went to was a Healing Mass.
I thought it was odd, and didn’t really pay much attention to what was happening.

The next year, we moved to Sydney,
and the church I attended and worked in had a Healing Mass every Wednesday.
I went, but never asked for the laying on of hands.

At Singleton it was Wednesday night,
but it was very rare that anyone would ask for the laying on of hands or anointing.

So, the Healing ministry was not something I was aware of, but it wasn’t my calling.

Until I came here.
Within a few months of being here, I became very aware of a need for healing.

The closing of St Mary’s. The selling of Trinity House.
These are painful things for a parish.
They also carry with them elements of blame and division.
To stay with them is to stop walking on the road to Emmaus.
The parish needs healing.
There are relationships that need healing.
Wounds that aren’t healed get infected and cause more damage, damage to parts that were ok.
It is time for healing.

Then their eyes were opened, and they recognized him

After the prayers, there will be a time for the laying on of hands and anointing with oil.
Everyone is welcome to come forward to receive healing.
If you would rather not, that is fine too.
I ask that while this happens,
we all pray for the healing of our parish, our relationships, our bodies and our minds.
I ask that you pray that all our eyes may be opened,
and that we recognise Jesus in all our lives,
in the breaking of the bread and in the knowledge of his healing and forgiving love.



Sunday, April 20, 2014

Sermon for Holy Week

Maundy Thursday



I give you a new commandment, that you love one another.
Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another.
By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.

It is no small thing.
On this last night with his friends,
those who had given everything up to follow him,
those who believed he was the Son of God,
that Jesus does this most significant thing.

He washes their feet.
The significance of this is found in how it was a servant’s job to wash the feet of his master’s guests. And if the wasn’t a servant, it was the host’s job.
Jesus was their leader, and he was humbling himself to wash their feet.
This was his whole existence on earth: St Paul tells us
   
but emptied himself,
   taking the form of a slave,
   being born in human likeness.

And being found in human form, 
   he humbled himself

He then commands that the disciples should wash one another’s feet.
He wants them all to be equal. No one is better than the other.
He wants them to be humble.

He then gives them a new commandment:

I give you a new commandment, that you love one another.
Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another.

Does this replace the old commandment? Love your neighbour as yourself?
No. That stands as a rule for all people.
Our neighbour is anyone we come into contact with,
even if we can’t stand them, we are to love them.

Jesus is now speaking of a different love.
He is speaking of a special bond of love that is to unite all those who believe in him.
He is speaking to us and how we are to be with each other.
How we are to be with the person sitting next to us.
We are to love them the same way Jesus has loved us.

The first part to come to terms with is to know how Jesus has loved you.
That will be a personal thing between you and him,
and only the two of you will know how that has worked in your life.
But, the result of that love from Jesus should be visible to everyone.

How it happens is personal.
How you respond to it in your life is public.
And most especially with those who share the faith.
We express our response to Christ's love for us in how we treat our brothers and sisters in the church.
The way we treat each other is really an acting out of our understanding of Christs love for us.
This is very telling.

Love your neighbour as yourself, yes. The old commandment is universal.
The new commandment is narrower, but more intense.
Love your fellow Christian the same way Jesus has loved you.
This commandment and obedience to it are evidence to the world of true faith.

By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, 
if you have love for one another.

Imagine if we actually did this.
Imagine if the church was actually like this.
Imagine how irresistible the church would be.

By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, 
if you have love for one another.

Out of that love would flow a love for all humankind.
When the church keeps the new commandment, the world will be able to keep the old.

Love one another, as I have loved you.

The love Jesus has for us is shown is shown in all its depth tomorrow.
The ultimate act of self giving and self sacrifice by dying on the cross.

And being found in human form,
            he humbled himself 
and became obedient to the point of death—
            even death on a cross. 


Good Friday


And being found in human form, 
            he humbled himself   
and became obedient to the point of death—
            even death on a cross. 

Jesus showed humility by washing his friends feet.
Knowing what was to happen, he goes to the garden, and prays to the Father that his cup be taken from him.
He is betrayed by one of his friends.
He is arrested by the powers that be. The civic rulers and the religious leaders.
The people have turned on him, their cries of hosanna changing to crucify him.
He is mocked, spat upon, whipped, flogged, beaten.

He is made to carry the cross that he will be executed on.

After this, when Jesus knew that all was now finished, he said ‘I am thirsty.’
The cup he asked to be taken from him, he now asks for.

It is finished.

As the crucified , Jesus identifies with every person who has ever suffered.  
Every victim of torture, rape, murder.
With every person ever killed in crossfire.
With every single one of the over 40,000 children who die of starvation every day.

With his cry from the cross “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” he is one with all who have doubted, with those who feel that the world is so unjust they can’t see how God can exist.
He is with every mother and father who has cradled their lifeless child.
He is with every person suffering alzheimers, losing all sense of recognition.

Jesus is the suffering God.
He is agonised, he takes on all suffering. He is in solidarity with all human misery.

By Jesus suffering and dying, he shows that he is involved in all human history, he is affected by it.
He is not a God who sits above it all and watches, he is a God who is intimately involved. He bears all humanities burdens. By his taking flesh, he shows that human history is the place of real struggle, not just a cosmic plaything.


Only a God who suffers can save humanity.
Only a God who knows the pain of betrayal, humiliation and violence can be with us in our pain.

In Jesus we see a suffering God with and in suffering humanity.

And being found in human form, 
            he humbled himself   
and became obedient to the point of death—
            even death on a cross. 

Easter Vigil


   And being found in human form,
   he humbled himself
   and became obedient to the point of death—
   even death on a cross. 

In his humility, Jesus showed us how to be with each other.
In his example of dying on the cross, he suffered for and with all human suffering.
In his dying, Jesus enters the darkness, so when we enter darkness, we know he is with us.
God goes into the darkness and makes it light.
By his dying on the cross, death itself dies.

Killing Jesus was like trying to kill a dandelion seed head by blowing on it.
Like shattering the sun into a million fragments of light.
The powers had done everything they could to stop God’s work.
The divine undercurrent that had been with Jesus seemed to have ceased on the cross.
But it was only hidden.
It bursts out of the tomb.
Nothing can stop it.
Nothing can stop the gospel.

The resurrection of Jesus is the gospel.

Therefore God also highly exalted him
   and gave him the name
   that is above every name


Jesus had taken the disciples on a journey where he had taught and healed.
 He had led them into confusion, and on Good Friday, to darkness.
Without his resurrection, there they would have stayed.

His resurrection throws everything he said and did into light.
All the confusion ceases.
Henry Scott Holland writes:
In the resurrection, it was not only the lord that was raised from the dead. His life on earth rose with with him. It was lifted up into its real light.

Jesus came not only to preach a gospel, but to be a gospel.

Without the resurrection, there is no Gospel.

AS the risen Jesus says to Mary

Do not be afraid.

Over the coming weeks we will hear how the disciples reacted to the Risen Jesus.
But now, it is how you react to the presence of the risen Christ in your life.

Do not be afraid to believe that Jesus died on the cross and rose from the dead.
 Do not be afraid to let go and believe that Jesus conquered death.
Do not be afraid to believe that by believing in him you no longer die but will have eternal life.
Do not be afraid.

The resurrection is the hope of life.
It is the hope that knowing that God is with us in our suffering,
and that it is not the end.
The resurrection is the hope of freedom from the bonds of death.
Death is no more, it has been conquered.
Jesus showed us that nothing can separate us from God, not even death.

Do not be afraid to believe in new life in Jesus Christ.
Do not be afraid of hope.
Do not be afraid to confess Jesus Christ as Lord.

Therefore God also highly exalted him
   and gave him the name
   that is above every name,
so that at the name of Jesus
   every knee should bend,
   in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
and every tongue should confess
   that Jesus Christ is Lord,
   to the glory of God the Father. 

Sunday, April 13, 2014

Sermon for Palm Sunday



When he entered Jerusalem, the whole city was in turmoil, asking, ‘Who is this?’

This is where is all begins.

All the teaching and healings, all the interactions and questions about who Jesus is, what he will do, who it is all for have all lead to this moment.

The moment Jesus is atop the donkey is the moment of no turning back.
This is where it all begins.

At this moment Jesus mission enters its last phase, everything is set in motion here.
The first steps of the donkey are the first steps to the upper room,
the first steps to the cross,
and the first steps out of the tomb.

Jesus doesn’t make these first steps, it is the donkey,
somehow showing that it is not his doing.
He is showing that this is not his doing, that he is not in control of it all.
It is bigger than just him.

The donkey fulfils a prophecy from Zechariah:

Rejoice greatly, O daughter Zion!
   Shout aloud, O daughter Jerusalem!
Lo, your king comes to you;
   triumphant and victorious is he,
humble and riding on a donkey,
   on a colt, the foal of a donkey.

This fulfilling also shows the momentousness of what is happening.
Jesus is bringing all what has been, all the past with him.
What has been will be of no consequence anymore.

Jesus brings with him the past and places it firmly into the present on the back of the donkey.
The donkey carries all that has been and all that will be.
All that was is fulfilled,
all that will be is now entering Jerusalem.

We can see this by the turmoil that Jerusalem is in.

The Greek word used eseisthe is more than turmoil.
It is more like shaken.
This same word is used twice after: at Jesus death:
the earth shook and rocks were split.

And again when the two Mary’s go to visit the tomb:

And suddenly there was a great earthquake; for an angel of the Lord, descending from heaven, came and rolled back the stone and sat on it.

Huge moments where God’s work of redemption for humankind,
where the bounds of time are broken
and eternity bursts into the present.

This is the turmoil Jerusalem is in, it is shaken.
It is an intimation of what is coming.
The past is ending, and the future is becoming present.
The shaking of Jerusalem is a preview and a warning.

On Palm Sunday, we are with the crowd. We shout and wave  

Blessed is the one who comes in the name of the Lord.

We also ask “Who is this?”
Who is this on a donkey?
Who is this on the cross?
Who is this risen from the tomb?
We ask who is this who can change everything past and present?
Who is this who is the beginning and the end?
Who is this who is making my whole life shake?

In the shaking of the people of Jerusalem, we feel the shaking in ourselves.
Our lives are shaken with the journey of agony, death, and resurrection.

We enter into Holy Week, knowing there is no turning back.



Sunday, April 6, 2014

Sermon for the Fifth Sunday of Lent



I am the resurrection and the life. 

If you think about all the encounters we have heard this Lent:
Nicodemus, the woman at the well, the man born blind,
all of them have been ways of showing Jesus for who he is, the Son of God.
There has been dialogue where Jesus has taken each person to a higher understanding of who he is.

But with Martha and Mary, we go to an even higher plain.

Martha and Mary are already believers.
They believe that Jesus is the Son of God.
He doesn’t need to convince them of that.
But it seems that something is missing.

The sisters send a message to Jesus:
‘Lord, he whom you love is ill.’ 
Jesus response to this news is odd.
‘This illness does not lead to death;
rather it is for God’s glory, so that the Son of God may be glorified through it.’
He leaves it a few days. This is deliberate. He says to the disciples.
‘Lazarus is dead. For your sake I am glad I was not there, so that you may believe.”
So, off they all go. By the time they get to Bethany, Lazarus has been dead four days.

We now meet the two sisters, Martha and Mary.
A crowd has gathered around them, mourning with them, comforting them.

When they hear that Jesus is on his way, Martha goes out from the village to meet him.
‘Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.’
You can hear her say this. How many times was this phrase said over the past few days.
When Lazarus first got ill: We’ll get Jesus to come and heal him.
As Lazarus began to die, this would have been said with more desperation.
Then, when Lazarus finally died: If only Jesus had been here.

If only Jesus had been here. How many times the sisters said this to each other.
This phrase would have just sat in the air over the village for the past four days.
"If only Jesus had been here...."

So much so, that it becomes a greeting when Jesus does finally appear.
Both of the sisters say this to Jesus when they meet him.
But Martha adds to it.
But even now I know that God will give you whatever you ask of him.’
If you had been here, you could have stopped Lazarus from dying, but I still have hope that you can sort it out.

She doesn’t ask Jesus to do anything in particular, but hands it over to him.
God will do anything Jesus asks.
She leaves what to do up to Jesus.

What are the options?

Leave Lazarus where he is, or bring him back to life.
Jesus said to her, ‘Your brother will rise again.’
Jesus gives his answer. He will raise him.
But Martha doesn’t quite get it.
‘I know that he will rise again in the resurrection on the last day.’ 
This was the common belief in the Jewish faith, that there will be a general resurrection on the last day.

Martha may believe that God listens to Jesus, but she is still thinking in terms of the old way.
What he says of some comfort, but that is far off, it is distant.

Jesus grabs her and pulls her into the present:
 ‘I am the resurrection and the life. 
How can Jesus be a future event?
He might be it’s cause, but how can he actually be the resurrection?

Jesus is forcing language to say something that is inexpressible.

He explains it a bit more
Those who believe in me, even though they die, will live,
and everyone who lives and believes in me will never die. 
Believes in Jesus.
Lives in Jesus.

He says to Martha,
Do you believe this?
Do you believe this?’
She said to him, ‘Yes, Lord, I believe that you are the Messiah, the Son of God.’
She doesn’t answer the question.
She avoids it.
It must be too difficult for her to understand what Jesus actually meant.
Yet even there, she makes the highest statement of who Jesus is that we have heard so in John’s Gospel:
the Son of God.
She knows that Jesus is the messiah, but she can’t go further.
What Jesus has said is beyond her.

Then it is Mary’s turn.

She comes out to meet Jesus, with the same words:
‘Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.’ 
Unlike Martha, she adds nothing. There is nothing more to say.

Where Jesus had expressed the highest aspects of divinity to Martha, Jesus now expresses his humanity.
He is moved with compassion and weeps.

And instead of explaining the resurrection, it actually happens.
Those who believe in me, even though they die, will live, and everyone who lives and believes in me will never die.

Lazarus, come out.

Jesus shows Martha and Mary, indeed all those gathered what he means.
He raises Lazarus.
Lazarus is unbound from death and risen to new life.

We can all have this.

Those who believe in me, even though they die, will live,
and everyone who lives and believes in me will never die. 

This is the greatest hope we have. The hope we have in Jesus is the hope of eternal life. It is a life lived in Christ forever.

I am the resurrection and the life.
Archbishop William Temple expressed this like this:

“Fellowship with Christ is participation in  the divine life, which finds itsfullest expression in triumph over death.”
Those who believe in me, even though they die, will live, and everyone who lives and believes in me will never die.